


chocolate chip cookies

by daichisthighs



Series: watch me, feel me [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, Slice of Life, YouTuber Oikawa Tooru, hajime getting angry at him, hanamaki laughing at him, matsukawa wondering what he did in his past life to deserve this, no they're not cooking together, oikawa being a beautuber
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-15
Updated: 2020-04-15
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:54:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23673427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daichisthighs/pseuds/daichisthighs
Summary: A slice of Oikawa's life as a youtuber with Iwaizumi's participation in his latest video.Or, give Matsukawa and Hanamaki a damn break.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Series: watch me, feel me [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1709515
Comments: 6
Kudos: 95





	chocolate chip cookies

**Author's Note:**

> i just watched Bretman Rock's video with his boyfriend so the idea popped in my mind and i wrote it like,,, in an hour. here you go. i had fun writing it even tho uploading it here was a total bitch, i hope you have fun reading it too! 
> 
> (english is not my first language so bare with me please)

Hanamaki takes his place beside Matsukawa's left on the couch and eats a popcorn. "Let's watch it!"

Matsukawa sighs as he presses the 'start' button on the screen. "I feel like I'm watching Iwaizumi's funeral."

"Well," Hanamaki says. "It basically is." They start to laugh but their attention focuses on the screen when they hear their friend's cheerful voice.

"Hi there~" Oikawa waves to the camera with a shit eating grin on his face, only from his friends POV of course. His viewers probably think that the smile is cute or something. Really. "Welcome back to Oikawa-san's channel! As you guys know, I made an Instagram story about this video's content and," he stops for a second to imply his excitement. "you did your choice. Which is-"

"Hey, dumbass, what are you-"

Oikawa whimpers a little when Iwaizumi pokes his sides with all of his force but his smile doesn't die. "Iwa-chan doing my make-up!" Iwaizumi sighs as Oikawa presses their cheeks a bit more. "I'm so excited, Iwa-chan, I know that you _are_ too!"

Iwaizumi throws him a fierce look. "You know _sh-_ "

"Enough, Iwa-chan, enough," Oikawa stands up as he practically shoves Iwaizumi to the side as well. "Stop talking and start doing your thing so that I don't need to rate this channel as mature." 

The last thing they see on the screen is the brunette walking to the boy who has a scared look on his face before the video gets cut with colorful lines. Hanamaki eats another popcorn. "Bet that hurt." Matsukawa hums and the video starts again but this time, Iwaizumi is checking his phone while Oikawa is throwing a peace sign.

"I prepared five shades of everything for you, Iwa-chan," he starts excitedly. "and to make it more fun, we will play a game with them." Iwaizumi's eyes shine with the word of 'game'. "That means I can spike this foundation bottles to your stupid head?"

Oikawa laughs. "Of course _not_ , Iwa-chan. You have to pick the right products for my skin and if you can't, I get to ask one question to you." _Iwaizumi looks at the edge_ , Matsukawa thinks and laughs a little. "What the he-"

"But," Oikawa cuts him off. "if you can, you get to ask one question to me. And we have to answer them honestly. Isn't that fair enough, Iwa-chan?" Iwaizumi picks something from the table, probably a brush, and they see it flying towards to Oikawa before video gets cut again. 

A second later, Iwaizumi and Oikawa are at their places before the video cuts off and everything seems normal, except the band-aid between Iwaizumi's fingers; him extending it to the other boy. Oikawa smiles to the camera before getting the band-aid from Iwaizumi and replacing it on his right arm. "We had some technical difficulties-"

Hanamaki snorts. "Since when Iwaizumi beating his ass is counted as _technical difficulties_?" Matsukawa hushes him.

"-but everything is okay now. Right, Iwa-chan?"

Iwaizumi mumbles something and Oikawa smiles again. "Shall we start now~" Iwaizumi sighes as he replaces his chair closer to Oikawa, meanwhile he is playing with his phone; probably checking his DM's.

"So," Iwaizumi starts awkwardly and Matsukawa is on the floor. "I _know_ for a fact that you put something before you put on foundation." Despite being awkward as fuck, Iwaizumi doesn't look troubled at all and because of that, Hanamaki is on the floor; next to Matsukawa who just finishes wiping his tears of joy. Iwaizumi continues. "What the fuck was that?"

Oikawa puts his index finger on his lips while _shh_ ing him. "It's called primer Iwa-chan, _primer_!" Iwaizumi looks at him, annoyed. "I know what it's called, smartass, I don't know which one!" Oikawa just smiles, Iwaizumi groans loudly before murmuring a, "Fuck," and grabs one of the bottles. Oikawa looks entertained. "It was a wrong choice, Iwa-ch-"

"Just shut up and let me finish this quickly so that I can go," Oikawa lays back a bit to let him apply the primer on his face a bit easier, Iwaizumi looks at the table. "Should I use my fingers or-" Oikawa points the star-shaped sponge. "You can use this." Iwaizumi curses.

"Aw, look at him," Hanamaki says. "he's making Iwaizumi use my gift." Matsukawa laughs. "Did you really buy him a star-shaped sponge for his birthday?" Hanamaki shrugs. "I couldn't find an alien-shaped one and you- oh, fuck." Matsukawa frowns with him to the screen. "What the _hell_ is he doing?"

"Um, Iwa-chan," Oikawa starts and licks his lips. Now, he is the one looks _troubled._ "I think you used more primer than I have ever used for 5 years." Iwaizumi takes a step back just to see Oikawa's face shining like he has been sweating for all this time. He shrugs. "I don't care." Oikawa whines for a bit, earns him a smack with the sponge. "Now," Oikawa says. " It's time for the punishment!"

"What?"

"The question Iwa-chan. Why are you always so mean?"

Iwaizumi doesn't stop randomly patting the sponge on Oikawa's face. "I'm usually not." Oikawa is about the start when Iwaizumi cuts him. It's Iwaizumi's turn to grin now. "To people who are not assholes, of course."

"Iwa-chan!"

Matsukawa sighs. "They can't stop, can they?" Hanamaki doesn't answer him.

"Hey, Shittykawa," Iwaizumi stops and looks at the other's face. "Am I done?" Oikawa makes a sound as he reaches for the hand mirror. Iwaizumi sighs when he shouts a "Yes~".

"Now it's time for the foundation! Choose it wisely, Iwa-chan." Iwaizumi curses again. "How the hell am I supposed to know your goddamn skin tone?" Oikawa puts a hand on his heart. "I'm hurt!" Iwaizumi checks the foundations for the third time, looks at Oikawa's face once and checks the bottles for the fourth time.

Oikawa yelps when Iwaizumi pulls the front of his hair to the back, where there is less artificial light. "The lightning is shit here, you look like a ghost," he murmurs as his eyes examines the other's face. Oikawa blows him a kiss, it is obvious that Hajime is holding himself from ripping all of Oikawa's hair from his scalp.

"This is the right one," Iwaizumi decides after a minute. Oikawa checks which bottle he takes and his eyes widen, meanwhile his lips get parted a little. "Surprisingly, yes." Iwaizumi smirks. Hanamaki makes a sound like he's about to throw up.

"Shouldn't you be happier cause I'm using the right tone on your face," Iwaizumi asks while grabbing the sponge Oikawa is handing him, the latter just _humph_ s. "I get to ask a question, right?" Oikawa nods as he sighs. "Shoot it."

"Why are you always so stupid, so childish-"

Oikawa gasps. "Excuse you, I'm not-"

"-so dumb, so crybaby, so stupid-"

"You said that one already-"

Iwaizumi pats the sponge on his nose not so very softly. "-so fucking annoying?"

Oikawa puts a hand on his heart, again. "I'm _hurt_ , Iwa-chan!" Iwaizumi puts some more foundation on the sponge and starts to pat Oikawa's neck. "Answer me, dumbass."

"You see, Iwa-chan," Oikawa starts, his voice a bit rough because Hajime is patting right on his chords. "I'm not those things you assumed that I _am_ , so I can't give you an answer, sadly." Iwaizumi snorts. "And you expect people to believe that shit."

"My viewers are elegant people, Iwa-chan~"

Matsukawa nods. "He's right about that." 

Oikawa continues. "They know who truly- mmh!" Hanamaki claps as Iwaizumi shuts him by stuffing his mouth with the foundation sponge. The video cuts off again.

It is Oikawa's disappointed face they see when the colorful lines disappear. "I can't believe you tried to kill me with _my_ make-up supplies, Iwa-chan." Hajime huffs. "What's next and why the hell it takes so long to finish this?"

Oikawa checks his face on his mirror before pointing the concealers. Iwaizumi relaxes visibly. "I know which one is this. You always carry this with you." Oikawa blinks seductively. "So you _do_ have interest in me, Iwa-chan."

"Nonsense," Iwaizumi picks the bottle. "even Hanamaki carries this shit with himself because of you." Matsukawa turns to the said 'Hanamaki' with a horrid look on his face. Hanamaki just shrugs. "I have sinned."

"I always forget to put it in my backpack," Oikawa states as he lays back. Iwaizumi tries to remember where he is usually applying it, his friends laugh at him when he puts dots with the concealer on Oikawa's face hesitantly. "Tell me where to put it, Trashkawa." Oikawa makes a gesture as if he is zipping his mouth close. "I can't tell you anything, Iwa-chan."

Iwaizumi groans. "And why is that?" Oikawa smiles and turns back to his phone, Iwaizumi's veins are starting to get visible. "Because that would be cheating." Hajime throws a few more curse words as he puts the product on his cheekbones, under his eyes, on his chin and forehead. "Fuck it." He takes the star-shaped sponge again and Hanamaki whistles for him.

Oikawa moves a little. "Your question, Iwa-chan." Hajime stops for a second before casually asking, "Who would you fuck, Matsukawa or Yahaba?"

"What the hell?" Hanamaki laughs as the latter throws himself from the couch. "Why would he asks something like that?"

Oikawa thinks for a while. "Definitely Mattsun. You?" Iwaizumi nods. "Same."

Matsukawa puts his hands on his face and rubs it. "These fuckers," Hanamaki is dying from the laughter beside him. "I don't want to _fuck_ any of them!"

"I mean, yeah, same but," Hanamakki wipes an invicible tear. "who would you, Iwa or Oikawa?"

Matsukawa doesn't even think. "Iwaizumi." Hanamaki nods. "Yeah."

"Finished," Iwaizumi says and takes a step back to see Oikawa's face. "I'm pretty good at it though."

"Iwa-chan," Oikawa says slowly. "I look like a clown. Even without the eyeshadow." Iwaizumi looks at his reflection on the hand mirror, not that he can't see it directly, and shrugs. "You always looked like one."

"Iwa-chan!"

Iwaizumi sighs. "Tell me what's next, dumbass." Oikawa pouts. "I told you to take it seriously!" Hajime's brows frown. "Oi," he calls. "I'm taking your stupid shit seriously, what the-"

"Highlight."

Iwaizumi's frown gets deeper. "What?"

Oikawa doesn't look at him. "Highlight is next."

The next thirty seconds are quite fraught; they see Iwaizumi's veins popping from his neck to his forehead, Matsukawa gulps, Oikawa putting his hands on the latter's wrists when the brunette holds him on the collar of his t-shirt and the video cuts off at the same time Iwaizumi opens his mouth.

"Wow," Hanamaki states. "Bet that hurt." Matsukawa just watches the screen until they can see their friends again.

Iwaizumi doesn't look angry and Oikawa doesn't look upset, which is pretty weird for the duo but Hanamaki can see the relief on Matsukawa's eyes.

"What the hell," Hajime looks at the five boxes on the table. "They all look same. Which one am I supposed to put on?" Oikawa doesn't answer as he sneakily tells camera that it's the third one, meanwhile Iwaizumi looks lost. So lost.

"Fuck this," Iwaizumi says, God knows for the what'th time. "I'm using the fifth one." Oikawa smiles so brightly that Iwaizumi knows he was wrong. "It's a pretty one, Iwa-chan-"

"Then I'm right."

"-but this one is _prettier_ ," Oikawa lays back on his chair and looks at the other boy. Hajime sighs. "Give me a fucking sponge."

Oikawa gasps. "You need to use a brush, Iwa-chan! Are you stupid?"

"Oi," Hajime says lowly as he takes the nearest brush. "Don't test my patient." Oikawa smiles knowingly but doesn't say anything so, Iwaizumi starts to apply the highlighter slowly on his cheekbones.

"Iwa-chan," Oikawa says after a little while, Iwaizumi doesn't stop. "Just thought that you want to know, this is a _blush_ brush-"

"Oikawa," Iwaizumi says and Oikawa shuts up but his smile is staying. 

Matsukawa yawns. "Isn't Iwaizumi being scary from time to time?" Hanamaki accepts with a nod. "That doesn't seem to stop Oikawa, though." They look at the screen and see Oikawa winking at Iwaizumi, Matsukawa moves a little. "Dude's a hard-ass. Really."

"Wow, Iwa-chan," Oikawa says as he looks at himself on the hand mirror. "You did a good job." Iwaizumi just flicks the tip of his nose, a bit harshly. "What now?" Oikawa stops him with his index finger up. "I didn't get to ask my question."

Iwaizumi sighes. "You can ask your stupid question when I'm doing the damn thing," Oikawa smiles a bit more when he sees the latter reaching for the first contour set. "You meant I can ask my stupid _questions_ when you're contouring, right?" Iwaizumi swears.

"He's fucked," Matsukawa and Hanamaki state at the same time.

"Do I need a sponge or a brush?"

Oikawa points the brushes. Iwaizumi frowns. "I need to apply it to your jawline and where else?" Oikawa shrugs. "I don't know, Iwa-chan~"

"Damn it," he says and dips a random brush on the shades. When he is satisfied, he starts to apply it on Oikawa's jaw; the only place he's sure that is right. The latter turns his head a bit to his right so that he can apply it easier. "Say, Iwa-chan," he says slowly. "do you love me?"

Hajime doesn't skip a beat. "Of course, I do. What type of question is that?" Oikawa turns his head to the left. "Just wanted to be sure~" Iwaizumi stops for a second to look at him and continues to work on his jawline. "Dumbass."

Matsukawa turns to Hanamaki, just to find him looking back at him. They look at each other before saying "Disgusting," at the same time, again.

"Iwa-chan."

Iwaizumi groans. "What's it this time?"

"Me or Kindaichi?"

"For what?"

Oikawa shrugs, his eyes anticipating. "In general."

Hajime hums and starts brushing the left product on his cheekbones. "Kindaichi is a good kid," Oikawa pouts. "and I don't fucking know _why_ in the world but," he puts the brush back on the table. "I'd choose you." The video cuts off for the nth time when Oikawa jumps on to Iwaizumi and they fall together.

"It's painful," Hanamaki says, looking into the void. Matsukawa shrugs. "I'd go with Kindaichi. Who the hell choose _Oikawa_ for _anything_ that is not volleybal?" Hanamaki sighs. "Apparently, Iwaizumi Hajime."

"So," Oikawa clears his throat and sits back on his chair, meanwhile Iwaizumi is putting a bag of iced pearls on the back of his head. "The next is eyeshadow."

Hajime sighs and throws the pearls to somewhere camera can't see. "Why the hell do you have a _yellow_ eyeshadow?" Oikawa waves his hand in the air to say him that he should move on. "Occassions, Iwa-chan, occassions."

"What is the concept," Hajime asks, confused. "where are you going with that make-up?"

"Good question," Hanamaki eats another popcorn. "A bit late though."

Oikawa smiles innocently. "The concept is me, Iwa-chan. You need to think with your tiny brain." Iwaizumi punches Oikawa, purposely not on the face and reaches for the brownish red one standing in the middle. "It's the right one, isn't it?" Oikawa doesn't answer immediately, Hajime grins. "It is."

"Am I stupid?" Matsukawa asks. "I don't understand. I would have choose the purple one. Isn't that Oikawa's favorite color or somethin'?" Hanamaki reaches for another handful of popcorn. "You're not Iwaizumi, you can't understand." Matsukawa doesn't have anything to say back.

"I'm hoping that I won't look like I just got into a fight with Ushi-stupid-waka by the end of this."

"I'm trying," Iwaizumi says. Oikawa laughs. "You try, you're so cute Iwa-chan~"

Hajime flicks his forehead. "Shut up, Assikawa.""

"Ow," Oikawa whines. "that hurt, Iwa-chan!" Hajime continues to apply the eyeshadow. "That was the whole point." A moment later, he stops and takes a step back. Oikawa looks at him back. "It looks fine." Oikawa reaches for the hand mirror and look at his eyes. Iwaizumi puts the brush aside as he starts to check the next product.

"It's," Oikawa starts and gulps before putting the mirror back, his arms linked in front of his torso. "not bad."

Hajime grins. "It's perfect."

"Whatever, the question, Iwa-chan. You always forget it." Iwaizumi thinks while tapping on the table. "Were you the one who ate all of the chocolate chip cookies when you stayed the night at mom's?"

Oikawa laughs nervously. "...wasn't that your dad?" Iwaizumi looks at him. Oikawa huffs and throws his arms to the air. "Okay, I did it! But I didn't eat _all_ of them," he says as he avoids a brush from Iwaizumi. "your dad ate at least _four_ of them!" He shows Hajime four fingers before one of them gets hit by another brush.

"You little shit!" Iwaizumi throws a sponge. Oikawa caresses his finger with teary eyes. "My mom scolded him for a _week_!" After Iwaizumi finishes his sentence, Oikawa looks at him with wide eyes. "Your dad," he starts. "he is a good amirite. He didn't sell me back at there. I need to call him later-"

"Oikawa!"

Matsukawa sighs and stands up from where he is sitting, taking the now empty bowl with him. "Want some more?" Hanamaki nods as he looks at the colorful screen. "You can continue without me, if Oikawa is still alive."

"Are you mad, Iwa-chan?"

"I just can't believe that you turned my dad into an Oikawa," Iwaizumi starts. "it would have been okay if you turned him into an ordinary Oikawa because I like your mom, she's nice but you turned my dad into an _Oikawa Tooru._ "

"But still. Your mom loves me more than she loves you." Oikawa sticks out his tongue. Hajime sighs, again, and looks at the table. "Lipstick?"

Oikawa smiles. "Lipstick."

Matsukawa nearly drops the bowl when hears Hanamaki's horrified scream from the living room.

"What," he says. Hanamaki looks at him behind the couch, his phone on the floor. "What happened?" Hanamaki points the phone, Matsukawa hands it back to him. "Just," Hanamaki takes a deep breath. "just watch."

"What the fuck" Iwaizumi hisses. "They are the same color." Oikawa shakes his head. "Are not." Iwaizumi nods. "Are too." Oikawa shrugs.

"Help me out, Trashkawa!" Oikawa makes the same gesture as before.

"Oh, fuck," Hajime mumbles and takes the third lipstick. The clap sounds coming from Oikawa tells him that he failed. "You were doing great, Iwa-chan! But don't be sad, you will get to ask questions in the future. I'm sure!"

"Just sit the fuck down," Iwaizumi groans. "so that I can finish this." Oikawa sits down and becomes upright a little, giving Iwaizumi a good view. "You can start, Iwa-chan."

Matsukawa opens his mouth to say something but Hanamaki shuts him up by hushing.

Iwaizumi starts to apply the lipstick evenly, even though he should accept that his hands tremble a bit because of the sight of the latter. He is thinking that he is safe until Oikawa decides to talk in the middle of his job. "So Iwa-ch- _blegh_!"

"Idiot," Hajime states. "Now it's all on your-"

Iwaizumi gulps down at the half of his lecture because now, Oikawa is looking at him with his lips parted, looking a bit wet because of the texture of lipstick; his tongue looking a lot redder than normal, probably because of he managed to smudge half of the lipstick on it. Still. It is a delightful sight.

"-mouth."

Oikawa looks at him before smirking a little. "I need to give credit, though," he starts. "it tastes not so bad."

Hajime takes a step closer. "You think so?"

"Mmh," Oikawa moves his tongue further, Iwaizumi's eyes catching the movement immediately. "wanna taste it?"

Iwaizumi takes a shaky breath before licking his lips, unintentionally. "If it tastes not so bad." Oikawa nods faintly before they start to make out.

Iwaizumi breaks the kissing a while later. Oikawa is playing with the hair on his neck. "What about your question?" He asks breathy, his eyes shining differently now. Oikawa thinks for a second before pressing himself on Iwaizumi's crotch and make him growl. " _Fuck me_ , Iwa-chan?"

Hanamaki and Matsukawa are screaming like middle school girls now and no one is there to stop them. Matsukawa rubs his hands to his eyes. "I watched mom and dad sucking each other faces! How can I delete this memory?" Hanamaki is no different. "I want to report his damn channel! It was not a make-up video, it was _porn_."

"It was _make-out_ video!"

Hanamaki stops crying just to fist bump with Matsukawa. "That was good." Matsukawa sniffs. "Thanks."

"And," Hanamaki sits straight. " _'Fuck me'_ is not a fucking question!"


End file.
